And Still I Rise

After almost two weeks 'on hold', I finally get the news. And it's not positive. Until this point Schroedinger's cat has been both alive and dead- I have had as much chance of getting cast as the lead as not making the final cut. Having made it so far for such a big production, my emotions are heightened and I'm angry. I spend time making sense of everything, I bring myself downstairs, stick on some music and dance it all out. Shake it off, start again and face a new day. This is par for the course in the life of an actor; we get rejected, we feel it, deal with it and focus on the next challenge. We are not only professional peformers, we are professionals at dealing with rejection. There is one part of life as an actor which will determine the potential of your career path from day 1. While there are many variables to consider, each one determining what level of the industry you work within, dealing with rejection is one key area which every actor needs to get their head around quickly in order to survive. Every year actors deal with more rejection than many of our peers have to face in an entire lifetime; it truly is remarkable. There is the common image in society of the 'struggling actor', we are encouraged by many members of mainstream society to think of poor actors who need our pity as they struggle to get by rejection after rejection. Yes, it is tough making a way as an actor, it is a struggle at times and we do need support. However, what we don't need is pity- we demand your recognition and deserve your admiration. We also deserve admiration from ourselves. Working actors are warriors on the front line, giving their everything and rising up each time we fall. We have tenacity, resillience and courage. We face each fall with grace and refuse to let it affect us so deeply that we lose our motivation to keep going. Actors accept it as a given that this repeated rejection can be the most difficult area of the industry, in fact our attitude towards it is what will determine the longevity of our career. Rejection isn't simply an inconvenient hurdle, rejection inflicts damage to our psychological well being which goes way beyond emotional pain. It affects our behaviour, our emotions and thought process in reflex manners which are beyond our control. Recent fMRI scans show that we use exactly the same area of the brain to process rejection as we do physical pain- no wonder some rejections feel like a kick in the shins, to our brain they are exactly the same thing. Only with a kick in the shins we can forget as soon as the pain passes, with social pain like rejection we can relive the experience just as vividly as the moment it happened- the neurological pathways are much stronger. In the past, as hunter gatherer tribes people rejection was fatal. No man could survive alone without the tribe, and so, many evolutionary psychologists assume that the brain developed warning signals to alert us to moments when we were at risk of ostracism. Those with most heightened awareness of when this was likely altered their behaviour in time to remain part of the group, holding a strong evolutionary advantage- hence why rejection has developed to become such a strong part of our memory today.

Remembering these incidences where we have been rejected not only trigger an identical level of pain, it also temporarily lowers our IQ. Speaking of a study on the matter, Dr Guy Winch has said "Being asked to recall a recent rejection experience and relive the experience was enough for people to score significantly lower on subsequent IQ tests, tests of short-term memory, and tests of decision making. Indeed, when we are reeling from a painful rejection, thinking clearly is not that easy". It isn't any real surprise then that rejection does not repsond to reasoning. In a further study on rejection, participants were put through an experiment whereby they were rejected by strangers. For the aim of the experiment, everything had been set up in advance and they were not genuinely rejected at all- however, being told this did little to ease the emotional pain felt by the participants. This is what we experience with every rejection we face, which for many actors is on a weekly basis. No wonder so many actors hate audition conversation! With every caring friend or family member who asks how it went on unsuccessful ocassions we are reliving those same feelings, unable to reason with ourselves that it's part of the process and we shouldn't feel annoyed. Having also been found to be a key trigger for rising levels of anger and aggression, it's not too surprising they many may struggle to control their emotions. It takes only one quick Internet search to generate case study after case study of revenge attacks by rejected lovers on their partners to see this link in action at it's most extreme. Of course the attackers in these case studies are seriously mentally imbalanced, but can you imagine if every actor who didn't get a part went to this extreme? We all face rejection- be it romantic, professional or social, and we all have to deal with it. But to my fellow actors, I salute you for your continued efforts in the face of paniful, repeated mental injury. What we do in our industry is a phenomenal demonstration of human strength, not to be underestimated. It is no mean feat what we take in our stride, indeed many would stumble at the first step.